Toast

...for mommy

Shadows cascade like faded memories blurred by time long passed
Visions of tomorrow have become yesteryears dreams and the hopes you once had for riches are far from what you thought they'd be –
You're running on empty, fueled by disdain, for a life you thought you were promised, but could never sustain
It's like a glass has been raised in your honor…a toast set for kings
But the wine is really vinegar, the toast becomes a reckoning
Time has evaded the sense you thought you owned
And you've lost sight of the things that you have convinced yourself matter
Falling upward on a climb from the depths of success
You knew, with all your heart, you gave it your best
But your best was cigarette smoke and cheap sex
Where will you lay your heart to rest,
When you've emptied your pockets and have nothing left?

Ashes fall from the walls, burning the embers of people with no faith…
Still nothing changes your view, the condition you pursue…and your faith turns to hate
And you become blackened by your distaste for all that is pure
Forgetting
Relenting
Inventing an excuse to ignore the truth
You're fading from the photograph…while being caged in your frame
You want to ignite a firestorm, but can't seem to flicker a flame…
It's life as you know it
Lacking, limiting, existing in a prison of your own doubt
You thought it was safe to build a wall, and so you did, but forgot to build a way out
Like chains that burn flesh in freedoms name
You're living in a pain that you can't overcome

But it was you…you who showed me the ropes, the ropes to climb
To move a mountain
It was you … you, who loved me through the ignorance,
That made me run faster to nowhere…
And remained loyal to me as I discovered running after dreams was really just me running after me…
And that the precious things that mattered would only come from within.
But you fell victim to a landslide…
So today I return the love
and I raise a glass, make a toast…
A toast in your honor…
And hear you laugh
Because you forgot the power you possess
The power I possess
So I raise a glass, make a toast
A toast in your honor
and let you go –
let you go to rediscover your power
smile as you journey on…remembering isn't really hard if you believe you always knew it…
so toss your instructions out and feel your way back to the truth. I love you.

©2008 Jason Rivera